How to Deal With Sadness

We know that suppressing sadness is harmful to long-term mental and physical health. Denying such feelings may force them underground, where they can do more damage with time. We know that allowing ourselves to fully feel and express our sadness builds resilience, fosters empathy, and is an important part of self-care. Knowing these things does not make it easier to actually cope with sadness.

It is important to find healthy ways to process and express these emotions in order to maintain good mental health. Wallowing, self-medicating, or engaging in self-harm can feel like effective alternatives to suppressing emotions, but they are just as unhealthy and harmful. So what should we do when we're feeling sadness? Here are some healthy, practical steps you can take to cope with sadness:

1. Really feel it. Cry if you want. According to The Jed Foundation, a non-profit dedicated to preventing teen suicide, "while some people resist crying, crying can be profoundly cathartic and beneficial; not only can crying be a satisfying expression of sadness, it can bring greater clarity about the cause of that sadness." Notice if you feel relief after the tears stop. Engage in activities that soothe you, such as watching a favorite movie or listening to music that expresses how you feel.

2. Create something. Art is proven to be a powerful way to help process pain and provide a direct connection between the mind and body to help with the healing process. Art allows you to externalize and release difficult emotions. One common strategy is to represent things you want to let go of as words, drawings, colors, or images on a blank canvas and then destroy it in any way you please. This can include burning it, ripping it up, throwing it away, putting it in water, or covering it up with something new that inspires you.

3. Journal. Writing exercises can help purge emotions and provide a sense of release. Putting your feelings on paper gets the negative thoughts out of your head and makes them feel more manageable.

4. Move your body. There are many physical activities that can help with releasing emotions. Swimming, biking, walking, and dancing can help improve emotional well-being and mood, reduce anxiety, and improve sleep quality, while boxing and circuit training can release anger. Deep breathing exercises can help calm the mind and release tension in the body. Trauma release exercises can help release deep muscular patterns of stress, tension, anxiety, and trauma.

5. Talk about it. Practice articulating sadness by talking to a trusted friend or therapist. In addition to helping release emotions and allowing us to feel supported, talking to others about our feelings can put things into perspective and even give us good ideas to address the cause of our sadness.