Advice for People Who Are Scared to Come Out
June is LGBTQIA Pride month, which exists, in large part, to advocate for a safe and supportive environment for people of all sexualities and gender expressions. If you are struggling with your identity, I want to affirm that coming out as queer can be a daunting and overwhelming experience, and many people may feel scared or unsure about how to navigate this process. Simply existing as a member of the LGBTQIA community is often made difficult because of a lack of support and sometimes because of outright antagonism. This is especially true for transgender and gender non-conforming folks who are under increased legislative attack and who face a rising wave of anti-trans violence. However, despite the risks, living authentically and embracing one's true identity can lead to a happier and more fulfilling life. In fact, research indicates that “coming out provides a tangible benefit in terms of both biological and mental health.”
First and foremost, it is imperative to recognize that coming out is a personal choice and should be done at your own pace. There is no right or wrong way to come out, and each individual's journey is unique. Be patient and kind to yourself throughout this process, as it can be a difficult and emotional time.
One strategy that can be helpful when coming out is to seek support from friends, family, or a therapist. A support system can provide a sense of safety and comfort during this vulnerable time. Additionally, seeking out resources such as support groups, online communities, or your local LGBTQ center can benefit those who may not have a supportive network in their personal lives.
Another crucial aspect of coming out is prioritizing self-care. This can include engaging in activities that bring joy and relaxation, practicing mindfulness and self-compassion, and seeking professional support if needed. Taking care of yourself during this process can help to reduce stress and anxiety and promote overall well-being.
It’s also important to remember that coming out is a continual process, and it is okay to take breaks or step back if needed. Coming out is not something you owe to people. It’s about sharing an important part of your identity with people you value and doing so on your terms. It’s essential to prioritize your own needs and well-being throughout this journey. Just as you wouldn’t disclose your medical history to casual acquaintances, you are not required to announce your sexual or gender identity to everyone either. Not announcing that you’re queer to everyone you interact with doesn't make you any less "out" or any less authentic.
Coming out as queer can be a challenging and emotional experience, but it is also a brave and empowering step toward living authentically. I encourage individuals who are scared to come out to seek support, practice self-care, and remember that their journey is unique and valid. By embracing your true identity, you can lead a happier and more fulfilling life surrounded by a supportive and accepting community.
